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Colbert: "this is the warped creation of a syphilitic brain." (w/video) [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5218266

Eggs like you've never seen them. You'll have to bring your own bacon [Cool] http://fk.cm/5218054

Mayor compares himself to Jesus after getting caught peeing on a tree. "Yes two blokes got crucified this week ...and.. http://fk.cm/5217585

One meerkat's quest for love = SERIOUS BUSINESS [Weird] http://fk.cm/5217499

Oooh La La http://bit.ly/9Pz2pI

Tuxedo rental: $125. Limosine rental: $200/hr. Having to call your mom for a ride home because your rented limo was r.. http://fk.cm/5217002

Abraham Hicks - The Paradigm Shift (NEW) http://bit.ly/bKq8Jx

Boy brings rabid bat to elementary school for show-and-tell, orders round of shots for all his friends [Florida] http://fk.cm/5217312

There's a right way and a wrong way to clean your bong. This is the wrong way [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5217148

Photoshop these parachutes [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5209800

President Obama cancels trip to Poland over concerns with plowing his presidential plane through miles of hot Iceland.. http://fk.cm/5216580

Okay, got the pasta done. What's next in the recipe..."add salt and freshly ground black people." WHAT? [Fail] http://fk.cm/5216360

China quake death toll rises to 1339, frustrating submitters everywhere at missed chance for geeky pun [Followup] http://fk.cm/5216152

Photoshop this teacher in a tunnel [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5208076

Tire-shop man, Tire-shop man, Tire-shop man hates Barbershop man. They have a fight. Tire-shop wins. Tire-shop man [M.. http://fk.cm/5215694

TSA says there are no children under 12 on No Fly list. Except, of course, for those on the list [Fail] http://fk.cm/5215798

Not News: Dog plays doting dad to four kittens rejected by their mother. News: Dog was shot in the head three times a.. http://fk.cm/5211573

Jesus saves... comic strips from being mediocre [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5214996

Catholic church goes too far, now blames porn for child abuse scandal [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5215134

Survivor: Treehouse [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5214907

Photoshop this control center [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5206641

Dieting increases your chances of getting heart disease and cancer. But you'll leave behind a great looking corpse [I.. http://fk.cm/5214682

Russian pilot gets lost and crashes before he could ask for directions from the driver of the tractor he hit [Weird] http://fk.cm/5214165

The truth is that fluoridation and the proclaimed benefit of fluoride as a way of preventing dental decay is perhaps .. http://fk.cm/5214095

Best Daily Show Clip EVAR, featuring the only guy out there that can make Jon Stewart beg for mercy [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5214130

10 traits that will come in handy during any apocalypse [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5213068

20-foot inflatable colon is the butt of many jokes [Obvious] http://fk.cm/5212416

Photoshop these lovely lanes [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5202122

Twenty-year-old woman becomes first person ever to be banned from every pub and club in Britain [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5211802

"I'm not going to lie. I was excited to get the pig fetus in the mail" [Weird] http://fk.cm/5211945

Abraham Hicks - Schizophrenia http://bit.ly/9dw6OX

Photoshop these clear containers [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5201713

Underoos were great when you were a kid. But now, Target will be carrying a large assortment of licensed underwear, w.. http://fk.cm/5211349

Abraham - To get what you want, line up the energy first, then take action http://bit.ly/aOuDge

When Jennifer Nicholas sees television shows or movies where characters "hook up" or have sex with "friends with bene.. http://fk.cm/5211111

Abraham Hicks - Are you a lover or a hater ? http://bit.ly/aRREEW

Dear Tenant, we just raised your rent as insurance in the event you die [Asinine] http://fk.cm/5210949

Topless woman wins fight with her landlord. Giggity [Cool] http://fk.cm/5210670

Abraham Hicks - Karma, sympathy and charity http://bit.ly/9lCYKq

An iPhone. An air conditioner. Dirty underpants. A sock-wearing mannequin. Thousands of cigarette butts. A pregnancy .. http://fk.cm/5210183

Hawks vs. Bucks playoff game Saturday (4/17) for Free if you are interested in becoming a Big Brother. PM me if you are interested....

Military completing test or of drigibles they believe will give them a decisive advantage in furture conflicts. No, t.. http://fk.cm/5209340

Beards build trust, unless you're an underwear model [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5209666

Eliot Spitzer: a three-hooker-a-day kind of guy [Hero] http://fk.cm/5208909

Abraham Hicks - Instead of death penalty http://bit.ly/caJGji

Scientists create a bulletproof t-shirt by adding a 4th wolf [Spiffy] http://fk.cm/5208264

It goes without saying not to use a loaded gun as a sex toy during foreplay [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5208020

Good news: Somebody comes up with something original for Hollywood. Bad news: Building mansions around the Hollywood .. http://fk.cm/5208216

Homeowner gets upset when neighbors complain about his new deck, so he decides to really give them something to whine.. http://fk.cm/5208095

Theme of Farktography Contest No. 258: "One is the Loneliest Number". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week'.. http://fk.cm/5207804

Man arrested for exposing himself to young girls is also known to throw stones at passing cars. Clearly, this guy lik.. http://fk.cm/5207036

Icelandic authorities evacuated about sadkjnueriuanj people early Wednesday when a vanjfjfnfnekenfn erupted beneath t.. http://fk.cm/5207383

Photoshop this coach having a conniption [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5197585

Can The Rank Decoding Engine Software Guarantee Top Search Engine Placement? http://bit.ly/9n28oE #business #marketing

New York dating coach teaches nice guys how pick up chicks, score an 8.9 on Hot or Not, and have enough time to hit t.. http://fk.cm/5206226

Police bust 3rd grader for suspected heroin dealing. Next, on Thomas the Trainspotter [Weird] http://fk.cm/5205472

Old and busted: Wonder Bra. New and bottoms up: Wonder Pants. Fark: For men [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5205214

BBC implements Fark headline filters [Obvious] http://fk.cm/5205227

Abraham Hicks - Filters of energy http://bit.ly/9f7jYD

Copper piping stolen from hrch [Weird] http://fk.cm/5204706

"Health Reform is a BFD" wins the official T-shirt contest - and they actually admit it and put it on sale [Cool] http://fk.cm/5204352

Abraham Hicks - Who is doing the cleaning ? - Part 1 http://bit.ly/b2UYAs

Spirit Airlines' $45 carry-on fee meets some resistance. Crazy [Followup] http://fk.cm/5204179

Abraham: HOW SOURCE SEES NATURAL DISASTERS - Esther & Jerry Hicks http://bit.ly/9VApdx

Today: Parents hire "evil clown" to stalk, harass kids at birthday parties. Next week: Traumatized precious snowflake.. http://fk.cm/5204414

China scores a 6.9 in the tectonolympics [Scary] http://fk.cm/5204423

Abraham Hicks - Who is doing the cleaning ? - Part 2 http://bit.ly/agZKk7

Photoshop this bottle microphone [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5194790

Abraham Hicks - Molding the Energy http://bit.ly/cpHsPK

♫ This is what it sounds like, when frogs cry ♫ [Strange] http://fk.cm/5203241

Bettie Page, FBI Consultant. Offered expert guidance on whips, paddles, rawhide, ropes. Giggety [Spiffy] http://fk.cm/5203200

NJ Gov Christie is demanding the teacher's union fire an official because he wrote a memo that referred to Christie a.. http://fk.cm/5202126

Abraham Hicks - Teach children to trust their own Guidance System - Part 1 http://bit.ly/aFZTbq

Ouch: Police shoot man with 50,000-volt Taser. Farkin Ouch: after he suffers epileptic seizure on the floor in a gym .. http://fk.cm/5202375

Iranian official: We'll be nuclear in a month. But we'll only use it for electricity and food irradiation. And maybe .. http://fk.cm/5201909

Abraham Hicks - Faith http://bit.ly/9VzpFn

What happens when a Christian morals-first pharmacy doesn't sell birth control, condoms, porn, tobacco or makeup? Wel.. http://fk.cm/5201478

Abraham Hicks -Which career is best ? http://bit.ly/9cO7sX

For perhaps the first time in history, police are clueless as to whether a spraypainted goat has been attacked by com.. http://fk.cm/5200632

Fugitives on the run try to pull the wool over the eyes of the cops by pulling the wool over their eyes and hiding in.. http://fk.cm/5200918

If you're gonna steal someone's ID in order to steal unemployment benefits, make sure that person isn't on trial for .. http://fk.cm/5200506

Pens to erect big screen outside arena for playoffs. Yeah, I read that wrong the first time too [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5199969

What my inner being most wants me to know http://bit.ly/doUu6R

Catholic bishop fingers the Jews for the child molestation scandal. With oddly literal graphic of what "fingering the.. http://fk.cm/5199710

Abraham - Assorted great questions and Abraham makes a joke (Part 2 of 2) http://bit.ly/dCgYeK

Tips on how to fight an IRS audit. Attempted bribery (especially with pizza) notably absent [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5198838

Mom always said, "Just because you're preparing for the apocalyptic End Times war, doesn't mean you can't get a job.".. http://fk.cm/5198788

The Seven most horrifying things ever discovered in a human body [Scary] http://fk.cm/5198859

Abraham - Its not what you eat, its your alignment with what you are eating (Part 2 of 2) http://bit.ly/bNTw4m

Chinese scientists find cure for cancer. Of course, since it's China, it involves tainting your blood with toxic meta.. http://fk.cm/5197641

What Does Cell Phone GPS Tracking Have To Do With Mobile Phone Advertising With Ad Pods? http://bit.ly/bKboC3

Don't worry Virginia, if you want to recognize April as "Confederate History Month", you go ahead. Mississippi's got .. http://fk.cm/5197844

America's real religion: The belief that everything is someone else's fault [Obvious] http://fk.cm/5197677

Driver blames UFO for failure to pay parking fine [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5197230

Idi Amin's son charged with grievous bodily harm. Prosecutors will probably offer him a deal, but they aren't sure if.. http://fk.cm/5197337

Cow skips the step in the food chain called "Taco Bell", goes straight for the Sewer Pipe instead. Bonus: Beefy Pic g.. http://fk.cm/5197108

New York's latest annoying item is a) homeless beggars? b) lack of services? or c) tip jars? [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5196822

Photoshop this curved line [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5188816

There is cross-dressing, trash-eating homeless man in Berkeley who hates you [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5196221

Abraham Hicks - Spring Loaded http://bit.ly/a2ytG7

New York hipsters too busy growing neckbeards and listening to godawful indie music to fill out census form [Stupid] http://fk.cm/5196301

Since I'm a fellow lefty, I'm not too upset that Tiger did not win. Congrats to Senor Mickelson!

In a rare occurrence for Fark, a story about stalking and a big snake ends with the survival of kittens [Florida] http://fk.cm/5196041

In order to feel less stressed in the classroom, teachers are now using microphones to get kids' attention. "Hey, goo.. http://fk.cm/5195758

But ossifer, I'm the mife of the wayor [Florida] http://fk.cm/5195494

When trying to bring mowers across the border, one should clean the grass from them first [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5195150

Abraham Hicks - Fake it till you make it http://bit.ly/cqUDf2

The five most awesome jailbreaks you've never heard of (bonus: not a slideshow) [Cool] http://fk.cm/5194721

Man dies after SUV and bicycle collide. Fark: not the cyclist [Strange] http://fk.cm/5194898

Since no one else feels like doing it, Richard Dawkins to charge the leader of an international child prostitution ri.. http://fk.cm/5194687

Abraham Hicks - Spring Loaded http://bit.ly/aHijuE

Photoshop this castle [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5187436

Judge spares repeat drunk driver jail time in 1998. Eleven years later, same drunk driver veers into oncoming traffic.. http://fk.cm/5194022

Abraham Hicks - Unconventional Love http://bit.ly/aGEr2s

Jehovah's Witness knocked on the wrong door, gets a haymaker to the face from, wait for it, a Catholic priest [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5194298

Abraham Hicks - How to communicate with the Source http://bit.ly/95Mqkc

"Atheism is not a belief system any more than not liking chess is a hobby." Now if you'll excuse me, subby has to go .. http://fk.cm/5193619

Photoshop these birds of a feather [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5182947

Man escapes fiery crash, says "40,000 pounds of frozen chicken saved my life." Truckers say the darnedest things [Spi.. http://fk.cm/5193417

Federal stimulus includes $2 million to set Massachusetts on fire [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5193197

Co-founder of the American Restroom Association says airline's decision to use coin-operated toilets in airplanes may.. http://fk.cm/5193169

Abraham Hicks - Dealing with creative block - Part 1 http://bit.ly/amNjAO

If you're going to let your kids play outside in nothing but their diapers, you probably shouldn't be wearing a t-shi.. http://fk.cm/5192187

Four missing West Virginia miners found dead, final death toll at 29 [Followup] http://fk.cm/5192761

Abraham Hicks - Dealing with creative block - Part 3 http://bit.ly/9sorAD

Navy bans smoking on submarines. Wait, you can smoke on a submarine? [Weird] http://fk.cm/5192343

It takes one to tango http://bit.ly/917Ee0

Photoshop this wascally wabbit [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5178381

Sir Edmund Hillary's ashes won't Everest on world's highest mountain [Sad] http://fk.cm/5192621

Abraham Hicks - Dealing with creative block - Part 2 http://bit.ly/alk7Ze

The brave man's solution to baldness - with a photo that will probably cause underpants to be drenched from uncontrol.. http://fk.cm/5192145

ABRAHAM AND ME: Writing Lists To Manifest Your Stuff http://bit.ly/9mX7tl

The house next door is on fire. Do you: a) Call 911, b) alert other neighbors, or c) get the gorilla suit on? [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5192070

If you're a vegan, it's okay to eat oysters [PSA] http://fk.cm/5190948

Can You Improve Targeted Web Site Traffic With Sacred Email Marketing Secrets? http://bit.ly/aaxlnW

Soliciting sex from someone you think is a 13-year old girl is a very bad idea, just ask this former assistant police.. http://fk.cm/5191118

"It's 106 miles to the Chicago Fark Party AWpocalypse, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dar.. http://fk.cm/5190925

Photoshop this whale watch [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5177015

When trying to win back your ex, it's probably not a good idea to have a friend "mug" her so that you can save the da.. http://fk.cm/5189624

ABRAHAM AND ME: Did They Really Attract It http://bit.ly/dqFouL

Not news: Drunk driver veers off the road. News: Onto a practice driving track. Fark: That was currently in use by co.. http://fk.cm/5189206

Abraham-Hicks - Rampage of Invecibility http://bit.ly/bU4PmP

Sixth grader gives some of his mom's jewelry to a girl in his class. Mom finds out and says, "Awww." Just kidding,... http://fk.cm/5188681

Author recounts the last days of Hitler's favorite little girl. And, no, she did Nazi it coming [Sad] http://fk.cm/5188950

Man falls 30' saving suicidal woman, cushions her impact with his body, huge brass balls [Hero] http://fk.cm/5188674

California approves "Reagan Day", a holiday where we'll max out our credit cards, give guns to the local mosque, fark.. http://fk.cm/5188211

"Obama Eyes Interns." First he repeats all of Bush's mistakes; now he's imitating Clinton [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5188308

Abraham-Hicks: His Desire Has Not Manifested Fast Enough http://bit.ly/bteABG

Photoshop this log lug [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5175306

"Keep Pot Illegal." Who has that bumper sticker: (a) Republicans, (b) your dad, or (c) Northern California pot grower.. http://fk.cm/5187431

Abraham - Achieving success is your natural birthright http://bit.ly/9SmkSX

World's dumbest man calls police after finding crop of marijuana growing in his own backyard [Dumbass] http://fk.cm/5187017

If you can tell the difference between human bones and a piece of wood, then you're already overqualified for the Swe.. http://fk.cm/5185837

China tells GTFO to get the fark out [Interesting] http://fk.cm/5186959

Abraham - Is Abraham like Buddha? http://bit.ly/c0StDn

So the Qatari diplomatic isn't a suicide bomber; he's just an asshat who thinks his diplomatic credentials allow him .. http://fk.cm/5185339

Women spend two years and 10 months of their lives shopping, according to a study conducted by Sinbad [Scary] http://fk.cm/5185203

The lane in Spain is mainly this dame's bane [Sad] http://fk.cm/5185009

Abraham-Hicks: She's Not Sure Where Her Resistance Is http://bit.ly/9L7OOt

Today's media fearmongering story: sleepwalkers can kill you [Scary] http://fk.cm/5185175

What's the point of assigning your security force submachine guns and then altering them to be semi-automatic only? B.. http://fk.cm/5184816

Rare blue diamond sells for 6.4 million dollars. Would you like that in paper or plastic, Mrs. Woods? [Cool] http://fk.cm/5184013

Phuket landlord electrocuted. If only there was an exclamation for him to express his dismay [Sad] http://fk.cm/5184026

41 years ago, the Supreme Court struck down laws banning private possession of obscenity, paving the way for the inte.. http://fk.cm/5182790

With nothing else left on their agenda, local city council bans feeding of ducks in parks. I feel safer already [Asin.. http://fk.cm/5183081

Abraham Hicks - Guardian angels or the call of Source ? http://bit.ly/ccFvuI

Photoshop this busy clockface [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5170670

County commissioners openly invite Hollywood to blow up the old Tampa Bay bridge [Florida] http://fk.cm/5182011

Appeals court reinstates murder charges against drive-in bookstore trucker saying he should have read warning signs t.. http://fk.cm/5182051

Caribbean Cruise 2010 http://bit.ly/drfJNd

Armless woman sews with feet. You gotta hand it to her [Cool] http://fk.cm/5181527

Old and busted: earthquakes caused by government satellites. New hotness: earthquakes caused by Deepak Chopra [Amusing] http://fk.cm/5181594

Abraham Hicks-Collective Inner Being - Part 1 http://bit.ly/dcoASH

Man convicted of $1 million Medicaid fraud involving adult diapers. Will he do hard time or be pampered? Depends [Dum.. http://fk.cm/5181216

Latest research shows that eating fruits and veggies does NOT prevent cancer. Fark it, I'm going back to my bacon and.. http://fk.cm/5180743

Veterans Affairs to Veteran: You have PTSD. Veteran: Can I haz my benefits then? Veterans Affairs: Prove you have PTS.. http://fk.cm/5180368

♫ It's time to put on makeup ♫ It's time to dress up right ♫ I said, it's time to dress up right ♫ DAMMIT, DRESS UP R.. http://fk.cm/5180826

Mine operator had 57 safety violations last month & refused a legally required ventilation system upgrade that would .. http://fk.cm/5180212

Abraham Hicks - How to communicate best with others ? http://bit.ly/b5Dz3O

Farker's friend is battling liver cancer; please Photoshop her dog (DIT) [Photoshop] http://fk.cm/5170187

Abraham Hicks Inspired My goal is to feel good - Medium.m4v http://bit.ly/aSu78z